Jane Protip – Beer Belly Bitching

To the three-top of guys behind me at Café Brazil who have been arguing about what one guy ordered for more than 30 minutes – no one cares about how people should expand their tastes beyond fake cheeses, or that what someone orders is their personal choice, or how that sarcastic comment was totally taken out of context and “how could you not know that, you’ve known me for years!” You sound like high school teenagers, shocked at how what’s-her-face could even think about doing some heinous bullshit that matters none in the scope of things (except to you, because you can’t see outside your little “me me me” bubble). How did this argument even start? Who are you people? Why are you ruining my dinner? Everyone hates you.